I'm just not happy

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I used to work with a bloke who was always the one messing about and cracking jokes he had a bit of family trouble and went a bit quiet then out of the blue he told me he had been depressed for a long time and had been on antidepressants, i said he was the last person i would have thought suffered from depression as he was always so happy and easy going and he said it was all front.

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The answer,chippy,is loads!
A good mate if mine told me recently that his mum wasn't too good and had spent 6 months in hospital. I thought she'd had an accident or got some terrible disease.
I was speechless when he told me that 2 years ago she had gone off the rails a bit and eventually lost her job. She is highly educated and had a top executive job in the civil service for want of a more detailed description. .She had started drinking and it spiralled out of control. The last 6 months she had been in a state of dementia. Didn't recognise anyone including my mate and his young son which really upset my mate.. he said she's home now and stays in bed in a mess ****** up. His dad's moved out. She can't be more than 50.
My mate said he hadn't told anyone because he felt ashamed...poor sod.
Man hugs awarded.
 
My personal opinion on the subject (not a popular one) is that the majority of “depressed” people just have a crappy outlook on life. There are the same amount of people “clinically depressed” (medication for imbalances) or genuinely “troubled” e.g. abused etc. The rest feel sorry for themselves because they can’t live the lifestyle they see on strictly come xfactor housewives of big brother.

MarkBowie as you say it's your opinion, an uneducated one though.

Speaking sadly from personal experience, after burying two friends who took their own lives and battling with depression myself for several years, anyone who says you need to toughen up and get on with things really don't know how debilitating it can be.
Speaking as a two times British Champion, which took guts, determination and sacrifice, started a business from scratch, married and divorced, nearly lost my house, get stitched up in a court case with two people collaborating and lying, start to suffer from symptoms of stress and extreme mood fluctuations, get stabbed in the face lose 5 teeth and a number of operations later, yeah, I suppose your right I should just suck it up and get over it.

I have had the highest highs and the lowest lows and been fighting all the way, medication made me better for a while then worse and a combination of other alternative solutions is helping me and I hope I am on the road back to normality now, but saying people who suffer just aren't tough enough is plane wrong.

If you had asked my opinion on 'stress' 15 years ago when I was flat out self employed, it would have been very different, as I would have said, stop paying them on the sick and see how quick they go back to work, I now fully realise how naive I was that opinion.

I really hope no one has to get the first hand experience I have had to change their opinion.
 
I don't know how many here listened to flintoff, savage and the ping pong guy but Flintoff opened up during one of the podcasts and I was gobsmacked at the stuff he came out with, I said it earlier times have changed for the better and the more people feel they can discuss this with family and friend the better.
 
Some people are limited to viewing the world via their own experiences. If they can handle it, then everyone else should be able to as well. But their window is not everyone else's window.

Male suicide is worryingly high. The current attitude to addressing mental health is not self indulgence or attention seeking. Poor mental health is real.

If your attitude is dismissive of it, then at least you are lucky enough to have lived a life untouched by it.
 
People are tired. Because of screens and the continuous impulses, or the lack thereof.

This I can see orally agree with.

Few year back me and the wife moved from our amazing home, stunning views, blah blah, to give our kids a life that we thought they would enjoy. Now we have large garden, own piece of Forrest etc, nice house, massive mortgage:doh:

And guess what we got it wrong a big TV with Minecraft would have solved it all, or YouTube on constant....


Mind you did teach the oldest how to clean, skin and prep a rabbit at the weekend. He now wants to make a rabbit skin hat:thumb:
 
MarkBowie as you say it's your opinion, an uneducated one though.

Speaking sadly from personal experience, after burying two friends who took their own lives and battling with depression myself for several years, anyone who says you need to toughen up and get on with things really don't know how debilitating it can be.
Speaking as a two times British Champion, which took guts, determination and sacrifice, started a business from scratch, married and divorced, nearly lost my house, get stitched up in a court case with two people collaborating and lying, start to suffer from symptoms of stress and extreme mood fluctuations, get stabbed in the face lose 5 teeth and a number of operations later, yeah, I suppose your right I should just suck it up and get over it.

I have had the highest highs and the lowest lows and been fighting all the way, medication made me better for a while then worse and a combination of other alternative solutions is helping me and I hope I am on the road back to normality now, but saying people who suffer just aren't tough enough is plane wrong.

If you had asked my opinion on 'stress' 15 years ago when I was flat out self employed, it would have been very different, as I would have said, stop paying them on the sick and see how quick they go back to work, I now fully realise how naive I was that opinion.

I really hope no one has to get the first hand experience I have had to change their opinion.

Saying it is an uneducated opinion is a bit presumptuous, you are not going to know my background, career or the challenges I have faced myself. You also missed the point of the post entirely. As I said, there are plenty of people that need the help and it is justified them asking for it. I have worked with some of the most resilient young people who have come from the worst set of circumstances that are beyond anyone’s imagination and they did an amazing job of making life work for them. I have also had friends (no longer) and colleagues who have deliberately saught a diagnosis to merely make doors open for them or because, as I said previously, they don’t have enough about them to realise life is a set of challenges you have to work through. I am not making light of mental health issues or the struggles millions of people face daily. Merely pointing out there would be a lot more services available for the genuine sufferers if my generation didn’t clog them up due to not making it as a celebrity.
 
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I love a deep dark depression, I find that I get creative and active and am able to really focus and concentrate on projects. It helps to block out distractions from the outside world. Although I trained to cultivate it and create it through meditation and easily pull myself out of it within a day or two. For those whom things just happen to them without any deep self awareness (sub-consciously as well as consciously) then it would seem impassable. As for suicidal impulses I've never had them, but have examined the possible causes while in the deep cold dark cave of my mind. One thing that does happen is that bio-processes in the body do slow and high levels of butyric acid is produced from excess gamma butyric (so much so that my shoes literally can dissolve), the one thing that came to mind was that cells have anapoptisis when communication between other cells it was programmed to cooperate with cease to do so and promtly die (failure of cell to do this is the main cause for cancer). Well I think that this occurs on a macrocosmic scale with the whole organism (i.e person) when it is isolated and such an impulse occurs from a biological trigger. To me it's just a cognitive tool, but must be really difficult for those who have a an ocean dumped on them and not being able swim.The human reaction of flight or fight also comes into play, people try and run from things they fear more so when part of their mind, rather than embracing the feelings, sitting down and examining their emotions, thoughts, life experiences and transmutting them into a learning experience to deal with life better.

Really think that kids shoiuld be taught basic psycholgical tools such as meditation or deep visualisation.

P.S. If you're happy why would you want to do things to improve life. Change is the only constant.
 
Dissolving shoes???

Also, if you think you love depression then you've never actually had depression.

My shoes have been known to semi-dissolve but it ain't had owt to do with depression.... Some folk seem to wallow in a permanently depressed state, the only one which makes them happy, paradoxically. We all know at least one, I'm sure.
 
I love a deep dark depression, I find that I get creative and active and am able to really focus and concentrate on projects. It helps to block out distractions from the outside world. Although I trained to cultivate it and create it through meditation and easily pull myself out of it within a day or two. For those whom things just happen to them without any deep self awareness (sub-consciously as well as consciously) then it would seem impassable. As for suicidal impulses I've never had them, but have examined the possible causes while in the deep cold dark cave of my mind. One thing that does happen is that bio-processes in the body do slow and high levels of butyric acid is produced from excess gamma butyric (so much so that my shoes literally can dissolve), the one thing that came to mind was that cells have anapoptisis when communication between other cells it was programmed to cooperate with cease to do so and promtly die (failure of cell to do this is the main cause for cancer). Well I think that this occurs on a macrocosmic scale with the whole organism (i.e person) when it is isolated and such an impulse occurs from a biological trigger. To me it's just a cognitive tool, but must be really difficult for those who have a an ocean dumped on them and not being able swim.The human reaction of flight or fight also comes into play, people try and run from things they fear more so when part of their mind, rather than embracing the feelings, sitting down and examining their emotions, thoughts, life experiences and transmutting them into a learning experience to deal with life better.

Really think that kids shoiuld be taught basic psycholgical tools such as meditation or deep visualisation.

P.S. If you're happy why would you want to do things to improve life. Change is the only constant.
I would respectfully say that, if what you're describing makes you feel creative and active, it's different to what I would call depression. I get that it's good to confront dark and negative thoughts, we all have them and it's good to understand and live with them, but that's quite different to depression in my experience. I'm not going to say that you're wrong, but I don't recognise your description as matching the condition that I've been treated for before. Thankfully I don't require treatment anymore, but it rears it head now and again and tends to drain all creativity, activity and enjoyment.

I strongly agree about meditation and using other cognitive tools, very useful!

Sent from my SM-A320FL using Tapatalk
 
When I had the closest possible encounter with the reaper without actually plunging into the abyss about 14 years ago, they sent me home with some Lustral tablets to combat the inevitable depression and post-traumatic stress disorder. WTF?? Just being alive and the dawning realisation of the enormity of what had happened was sufficient medicine. Ye - wasn't long before they went in the bin.
 
Dont know where to start with this thread, without me getting banned again...
We are all depressed...life is not a walk in the park, sniffing roses and dancing with fairies. We all have our own troubles, but Hey, suck it up princess and crack on with tomorrow.
 
Dont know where to start with this thread, without me getting banned again...
We are all depressed...life is not a walk in the park, sniffing roses and dancing with fairies. We all have our own troubles, but Hey, suck it up princess and crack on with tomorrow.
If you don't like the thread, then don't read it. But depression is an issue for some folk. Why feel the need to come on and write it all off as a non-issue?
 
Dissolving shoes???

Also, if you think you love depression then you've never actually had depression.

I can throughly enjoy the state of depression, both the cold darkness and the great sorrow of the soul now, but to achieve such I did have to go to great efforts to experience deep depression. It was really difficult to acheive, I was always a seeker after truth but people used to go on and on about depression so tried to recreate such a state in my in my youth and while at it undertake a gnosis approach to acheive a state of gnosis, self knowledge and enlightenment.

I broke all ties with friends, family anything that I enjoyed, having to turn down relationships until I had completed my quest as such. Ensure that no light came into the house I was staying in and mediatate on darkness and sorrow. Took a full two years to get to that place I couldn't get any deeper. The soles of my feet were being dissolved by the masses of butyric acid (luckly only people at work would suffer the stench from them...lol and me) in turn the organic compounds in my shoes, like cotton and leather were being eaten away by this acid produced by my feet.

Well gnosis was acheived, fears faced, feelings could be recreated on demand, everything within myself re-evaluated and given current weight of importance. We all have an internal values that we give to experiences, objects, people, ideas and that which whatever society has imprinted upon you. Once you beleive anything you auto assign a value to it, real or imagined doesn't matter and it controls your thoughts, feelings and reactions to events and people etc albeit subconsiously.

I just take control away from a random set of both biological and psychological wants/needs and replaced them with appropiate values, things just don't happen - we make them happen or put ourselves in a situation based on the sum of those values.

Hence I like making alcohol
icon_rofl.gif
 
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