I'm Struggling

Alastair70 said:

Hi Lisa, lots of really great advice here already so I won’t add to it.
Look after yourself and embrace all the positive things that you see around you.
Hope you’re back and on form soon.

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I will second that.

Hi Lisa,
If you are on Facebook you might want to have a look at this group "#BroCheck" . The "about" section says "
#BroCheck is a simple gesture started by my Brother Scott. The #BroCheck is simply checking in on someone you know may be struggling or maybe alone. This could be the difference between a bad day and someones last day.
We want to put a stop to the idea that men need to man up. Men need to talk and they need to be able to reach out if they need help. This group will be a safe place with no judgement and filled with love.
So please let's carry on what Scott started and have each others backs. Even in his darkest times he was always looking out for those around him. #BroCheck in on someone today"

It's has nearly 7k members, both men and women, who provide support for each other.

Wow so much of this thread rings true. Anyway one glimmer of light, a hobby as absorbing as brewing is seen by the psychologists as 'flow' where you get so immersed that it takes your mind away from the anxious thought patterns.As others have said, drinking and anxiety are not good bedfellows but personally I see my brewing and consumption as barely related so I will continue to see the large amount of equipment I have assembled as part of the solution rather than the problem.

Take care Lisa - hard I know, but know that these times will pass.

Great you are talking about it, I had a pretty rough 18 months and took me a long time to get talking and doing the things I needed to do. Well done for taking that step here.

I also think long walks, whatever the weather will help, preferably with someone else. Cook somethink different every week. And this is contentious, take 2 grams (2000 mg) of vitamin C every day. Finally start baking sourdough bread. Finally (2) turn off Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc.

bobukbrewer said:

I also think long walks, whatever the weather will help, preferably with someone else. Cook somethink different every week. And this is contentious, take 2 grams (2000 mg) of vitamin C every day. Finally start baking sourdough bread. Finally (2) turn off Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc.

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This is excellent advice, I would actually up the vitamin C recommendation to an all-round vitamin and mineral boost, especially Vitamin D and Magnesium, plus some 5-htp if you are so inclined, but of course check carefully if you are taking any medications for any contraindications.

This is possibly the most inappropriate recommendation on a forum about brewing, but perhaps lay off the booze for a bit. I find if I start feeling down, 3 days without a drink and I wake up feeling much lighter.

LisaMC said:

Hey guys

Just wanted to let you all know that if I'm quiet for a bit I haven't gone away for good. I really enjoy the interaction with you all, but I just feel like I've got nothing positive to add at the moment.

My mental health right now is the worst it's ever been - I'm suffering with constant anxiety over EVERYTHING, depression and paranoia, and it's ruining my marriage. Hopefully some of you will understand. Coupled with money worries, I feel like I've nowhere to turn.

I know some of it will get better on it's own if I ride it out, and some of it will need a lot of work.

I'm not looking for sympathy or pity, just felt like reaching out to you might help me to feel a little bit better. Also might help others if they are going through similar, to know you're not the only one.

It took a lot of courage for me to write this, so please don't be nasty or judgemental. I'm not gonna lie down and take it, or let it beat me.

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Hey Lisa
Not much to add to what has already been said but would like to echo that you are not alone.
Admitting that you are struggling is the first and biggest step to take.
Having struggled on and off with my own mental health recently I can say that the things that help me the most are exercise and being out in nature; so a walk in the woods is my perfect combo.
I can also second MIND as a suggestion. It's a fantastic organisation.

Some excellent advice here. I wish you the best, Lisa.

These are unbelievably challenging times for a lot of people, and you are very brave to admit that you have a problem.

It is impossible to put yourself inside somebody else's head, and I have no wish to play at being the well intentioned amateur therapist, but keeping busy is a big step towards feeling better about both yourself and the big bad world. The time spent thinking about other activities and hobbies is time not spent getting worried and anxious. I do a lot of walking, and I read quite a lot . . . . . Its great to loose yourself in a good book, and it needn't cost anything. The on-line connection to our public library has been invaluable during the last 18+ months.

Take care, keep well, and good luck

Sorry that you are feeling down @LisaMC. It is a difficult time of year after the clocks have gone back, some folk suffer from seasonal affective disorder (SAD), as a result of the shorter days. If you can get out in the daylight, this may help lift your mood and how you interact the challenges and difficulties in your life. Best wishes.

Hi Lisa, best wishes for a speedy recovery

there is quite a common condition called sad (seasonally adjusted disorder) i worked with 2 people that had it and was in the position to help the second person as their manager by getting daylight lights fitted in the office. ive begun to feel gloomier this time of the year and I replaced our warm white 3700k colour temp lights with daylight bulbs 6500k thru out the house. they take a while to get used to but have made a difference for us. I also find it usedful to focus on something good that will happen. like after the 21st of dec or thereabouts the days start getting longer. harder is finding something positive in amongst the negative especially if depression has set in. following my operation I cant drive for 12 weeks at least and I have weeks of sleeping on my back which I hate. I also wont be able to brew for 3-6 months. so things are quite shitty atm. I am just about holding on I turn on all the lights when the day is gloomy and find a positive. (today my daughter is visiting and whilst she cannot be in the same room as us due to post op quarantine she can sit in the conservatory and chat thru a patio door.I won't be able to have a hug till 2022 though.

hopefully lisa you find some good things amonsgt your situation and even if you feel you have hit rock bottom at the darkest point things canonly improve.

Hi Lisa,

I am sending you 's and 's. I understand how difficult a time you will be having right now and how brave you are to open up like this.

I had a breakdown a fair old while back now. I won't bore you with the details but it did end my management career of nearly 20 years. On the brighter side it gave me the chance to make a complete career change and go into partnership with my husbands business. I still find it hard to admit at times that I did and still do suffer with stress, depression, and anxiety. If it was not for my husbands love, understanding and support things could of been so different.

Keep talking, stay strong and you with come out the other side a stronger person. Take care x

Thank you everyone for your overwhelming support. I feel very privileged to have met such a wonderful bunch of people.

Be kind to yourself.

Seek professional support if you feel you need it

LisaMC said:

Hey guys

Just wanted to let you all know that if I'm quiet for a bit I haven't gone away for good. I really enjoy the interaction with you all, but I just feel like I've got nothing positive to add at the moment.

My mental health right now is the worst it's ever been - I'm suffering with constant anxiety over EVERYTHING, depression and paranoia, and it's ruining my marriage. Hopefully some of you will understand. Coupled with money worries, I feel like I've nowhere to turn.

I know some of it will get better on it's own if I ride it out, and some of it will need a lot of work.

I'm not looking for sympathy or pity, just felt like reaching out to you might help me to feel a little bit better. Also might help others if they are going through similar, to know you're not the only one.

It took a lot of courage for me to write this, so please don't be nasty or judgemental. I'm not gonna lie down and take it, or let it beat me.

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Hi Lisa

I haven't read all the replies so Appologies if I duplicate someone else's answer, but having been there myself I have plenty of advice on coping strategies for better mental health and wellbeing.
We actually run wellbeing and spiritual events for free for people with the sole aim of giving back to the community and helping people.
Your welcome to message me for my number if you want to talk in private.
Breaking things down into smaller more manageable proportions is the first thing.
The number one thing to work on is your health, everything else can wait, walking, especially in nature and mindfulness excersises to keep you in the present will really help with anxiety.
Meditation is fantastic for mindfulness, but when your in anxiety you can't still the mind enough I found.
Simple techniques like going for a long walk and spending time noticing the details around you like the birds in the trees, the colour of the leaves etc anchors you in the present.
Anxiety is worrying about what hasn't happened yet and overthinking what may happen, if you keep yourself in the present it really helps.
When I was really bad, I would walk and literally count the gaps in the pavement, anything that keeps you mindful keeps you in the present.
If your on Facebook I can point you to our page and talk about some other options