Things I've seen when riding my bike

The Homebrew Forum

Help Support The Homebrew Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
Interesting. Any particular 'type' you could narrow it down to? Most have H&K weapons. Mp5 or G36 type models. Having a large gun on the street isn't practical.
 
I was riding down a farm track the other day and a woman driving towards me was flashing her lights, blaring her horn and shouting " pig, pig!!!" at me, i turneded my head as i rode past her at speed, and shouted, " #;@:+ off you cow!!! " and as i turned my head forward again...... Thats when i hit the pig!



I think you are telling porkies. :wink:


.
 
I guess they may be small in comparison to other rifles but i bet one of these looks big when you are stood a couple of feet away and especially if you have never seen police carrying guns before.


_86791568_armedpolice_getty.jpg
 
Interesting. Any particular 'type' you could narrow it down to? Most have H&K weapons. Mp5 or G36 type models. Having a large gun on the street isn't practical.

I dont know anything about assault rifles (why would I :mrgreen:) but doing a bit of googling on your suggestions, they looked like the G36 type ones
 
I guess they may be small in comparison to other rifles but i bet one of these looks big when you are stood a couple of feet away and especially if you have never seen police carrying guns before.


_86791568_armedpolice_getty.jpg

I've seen police in train staitions with the smaller MP5 type ones but these were huge like the ones in your piccy. They looked like the kind of thing you'd use on a battlefield. Not quite sure how practical they'd be on a crowded london street
 
I've seen police in train staitions with the smaller MP5 type ones but these were huge like the ones in your piccy. They looked like the kind of thing you'd use on a battlefield. Not quite sure how practical they'd be on a crowded london street

no sane terrorist is going to take on someone with that (soft targets are preferred) so that's the best place to be, standing next to someone with a gun like that! :thumb:
 
Today I saw...the road..... At very close quaters. As I came off my bike due to skidding on wet leaves. I was only about 500m from home as well. I now have two skinned elbows, a skinned knee with a big bump and a skinned hip :-(

Im currently icing my knee and consoling myself with a can of brooklyn lager. It's nice lager though
 
I made and old lady do a little dance in the blue cycle lane today. She stepped out into the road without looking then saw me bearing down on her. But she didn't know wether to go backwards back onto the pavement or continue going across the road so she tried to do both and did a little dance :lol:

I've also discoved I have a little passenger on my bike. I regularly clean the drive chain but rarely clean the bike itself (it helps that its black). I was changing the front break pads yesterday and noticed a spider web between the front forks and frame. I'm sure I've seen it before but when I changed the breakpads a small spider ran down the forks and then back up again. I quite like insects and arachnids so I left him alone to enjoy being a passenger on my bike rides
too right - I often find bugs or snails that have latched on if I don't use the bike for more then a few hours - often looking a little disorientated by the journey or the bright lights on a train when im on my way to a night shift!

I do try to save them all - they deserve it for being so brave
 
Today I saw...the road..... At very close quaters. As I came off my bike due to skidding on wet leaves. I was only about 500m from home as well. I now have two skinned elbows, a skinned knee with a big bump and a skinned hip :-(

Im currently icing my knee and consoling myself with a can of brooklyn lager. It's nice lager though

Ouch!

Mate fell off his Bianchi after hitting a white line in the rain in France.

He was suffering from concussion so a passerby called an ambulance.

The ambulance crew decided to take him to hospital, at which point one of the crew asked "What shall we do with his bike?" the passerby (obviously a cyclist) looked at the marque and said "He will definitely want it with him!"; and I think I know why!

https://www.lakes-cycles.com/bianch...k-grph-celes?gclid=CKeaucHUuNACFRG6GwodKEoNHw

He has fully recovered and is now well enough to avoid most white lines and concentrate on hitting potholes! :whistle: :whistle:
 
I......... i bet one of these looks big when you are stood a couple of feet away and especially if you have never seen police carrying guns before.


_86791568_armedpolice_getty.jpg

It works the other way round as well. :lol: :lol:

Police Station at 2am.

Man walks in and says to policeman on the desk "I've come to give myself up."

PC "What for?"

Man "I've killed my wife and her lover."

It was cold outside and we often had people "giving themselves up" to get a night in a nice warm cell so ...

PC "What did you kill them with?"

Man "A Colt Forty-five."

PC (sarcastic sneer) "A Colt Forty-five eh? Sure it wasn't a Luger or a Beretta?"

Man (puzzled) "No. It was a Colt forty-five."

PC (resigned) "Yeah. When and where did this all happen then?"

Man "Just now, on the Council estate and at the back of the shops on the High Street."

PC (bored) "We haven't had any reports of shooting." and as an after-thought before chucking the man out, "Have you got the gun with you?"

Man "Yes. Here it is!" and slapped a gun down on the eye-level ledge between him and the PC.

The PC assured me "It was like looking down the Mersey Tunnel. Christ, I could even see the rifling down the barrel."

It turned out that everything the man had said was true, except that "the lover" had only been shot in the stomach and he lived! :thumb:
 
Not really when cycling, but as a 17yo we had mopeds and were going offroad in the forrest here, when suddenly an actual unicorn and a donkey crossed our path, followed by a bunch of kids and teachers dressed as leprechauns and witches.

We stopped to look as we were completely flabbergasted by the whole scene. At that moment a teacher rushed over and she gave all kinds of hell. Apparently they were rehersing a play, and those animals were spooked by dirtbikes (she assumed it was us, but we litterally just drove into the forrest).

We helped catching the donkey (the ******* bit me) as the unicorn was already caught. We then got another ****load of criticism, whilst that part of the forrest is actually opened for motorized traffic, to give dirtbikes a play ground to limit damage to the nature reserve next to it. So it was virtually the worst place to reherse (there are even proper warning signs).

The scene with the running unicorn, chased by leprechauns is still repeated on every single birthday where we come together.
 
......... So it was virtually the worst place to reherse (there are even proper warning signs).

..........

Like it! :thumb::thumb:

The mind boggles as I am wondering what signs would warn off rehearsing unicorns and rampant leprechauns. :lol: :lol:

I also cannot imagine just how you managed to tell anyone what had happened.

When you got to the bit where you had to say

"... then suddenly I saw this unicorn being chased by some leprechauns and ..."​

... the listener must have been reaching for a straight jacket!! :lol: :lol:
 
This guy was walking along the main st in our town with a Sparrowhawk on his arm,as you do!
Me and my son chatted to him a bit,it was just a young bird and he was taking it to the park to "train it"

DSC_0380.jpg
 
Back on the whip after some knee and achilles tendon problems.

Today I nearly ran over a kid in the park called Romeo. He was with a school party and walking backwards down the path. The teacher/teachers assistant was yelling at him, "Romeo! Romeo!" and a young couple walking the other way called out "wherefore art thou Romeo" :lol:
 
I like to ride my bicycle, I like to ride my bike!

What do I see when riding my bike?

Well there's a Lamborghini in this next street, a Nissan Skyliner in the street after that, various Bentleys, Porches, a few Ferraris, and other such expensive metal boxes. There was a silver Aston Martin DB5 in the window of the local posh car showroom recently, I'm not much of a petrolhead myself but if I had one of those I'd have to have it retro fitted with machine guns, ejector seat, rear bulletproof screen, and the whole nine yards!

Possibly the single oddest thing I see though, as I will see at the end of my ride in about an hour and a half from now, is a field full of archers shooting at targets - being a member of the local archery club as I am :-)
 
Hello everyone, this is my first post. I was riding on a wasteground track near where i live, turned a corner putting a push on and near bumped into a woman in her late 50's giving mouth to groin resuscitation to her other half. Dunno whether high blood pressure had anything to do with it but they both went pretty red in the face!
 
Hello everyone, this is my first post. I was riding on a wasteground track near where i live, turned a corner putting a push on and near bumped into a woman in her late 50's giving mouth to groin resuscitation to her other half. Dunno whether high blood pressure had anything to do with it but they both went pretty red in the face!

Welcome to the Forum! :thumb:

Reminded me of Max Wall, a comedian from way back when.

Legend has it that he got banned from the BBC for telling a joke where he surprised a lady whilst crossing a narrow bridge and "Didn't know whether to block her passage or toss myself off."

They banned people for anything in those days! :lol::lol::lol:
 

Latest posts

Back
Top